Pastor Gomes Wildo

"Seeing him in that state, I felt a pain I had ever felt before. That young man drunk, dirty, he could hardly stand it was my son. My son ... "This statement plays a very uncomfortable situation for my heart. Many families have lived to see the drama addiction take over and slowly stealing the life of some of its members. Be the alcohol, drugs or gambling, the truth is that families suffer a great shock when they find themselves involved with this condition. Parents, children, siblings, spouses, even if they never put in the mouth a drop of alcohol or a drug tested are affected and suffer. They suffer a lot.

I spent some time wondering about what would be more difficult to face: the personal suffering or the pain of watching someone you love suffering? I concluded that when suffering comes to ourselves, we can adapt ourselves to our limits, we know how far can we resist. When suffering reaches those we love, the pain is greater, because many times we do not know what to do and not always we can help.

See son, husband, mother or brother being dragged ever deeper into the well causes a pain incomparable. Attitudes change of the dependent life of the whole family, and is greater than love, coexistence can become unbearable. For twenty years working with the rehabilitation of beggars, who are mostly drug addicts, many stories are striking. A fact, however, it is almost common to all: the family is affected so as itself dependent.

"From the moment my husband started to drink, our life became hell. There were more than twenty years of great sadness and love I felt for him turned into loneliness and shame. Although he had never even taken a sip, alcohol was the bane of my life, "said Leonora.

"The worst experience of my life was when my husband left in the morning to buy a pacifier for our baby, and at night, found him lying on the sidewalk with a pacifier in one hand and the bottle of rum, empty, on the other. When he reached the bottom, suffered more than him, "says Therese.

The addiction is not a contagious disease, but it is contagious. It involves the whole family, which eventually cancel each other and live the history of the dependent. Proof of this is that the Ministry of Health decided to treat alcoholism, specifically, as a public health problem. The treatment has to be extended to people living with alcohol users, who are also suffering and sick.

"When I discovered that my son was using drugs, my world collapsed. I never imagined this would happen with my son and do not understand how it happened in front of me and did not notice. My son's addiction ruined my life, "says Wilma.

"My son looks like someone else when you're drunk. It is aggressive, smash everything in sight. My wife and I never know how he'll come home and therefore live apprehensive. We are depressed because of this situation, "says Marcelo.

The truth is that we never imagined that addiction can come to our houses, let alone our children. But the danger exists and is very close to us. According to a survey by the Ministry of Health, ten percent of people who drink become alcoholics will in the future and 74% of adolescents enrolled in high school have used alcohol. This is a warning that we are always attentive to our children. Some simple everyday actions can help us to know them better and thus try to keep them out of addiction:

1. Be a friend of their children so they feel encouraged to say what they think and feel, even if it is very difficult to hear;

2. Open space for dialogue and give freedom to the views being exposed, even if they are different from yours;

3. Stay tuned to the friendships and the environments that he frequents. It's always good to know who are the friends of their children, receive them in your home and, if possible, have a little chat with the group, but without embarrassing;

4. Be aware of any behavior change. Unwell, loss of appetite, weight loss, irritability, drowsiness or insomnia, aggressiveness are attitudes that characterize addiction;

5. Always pray for your children, because prayer can do all things. Among the many qualities of Job was the attitude of offering sacrifices to God for the lives of their children. "And he arose early, and offered burnt offerings according to the number of them all: for Job said: Perhaps my sons have sinned and cursed God in their hearts. Thus did Job continually "(Job 1:5).

Despite all the pain and suffering that addiction causes to the lives of loved ones, we can not and must not give up, because there is a God who can do anything and has power to change any situation.

In twenty years of ministry, working with addicts, I discovered that God does not know the word impossible. Just to remind ourselves and we experience what the apostle Paul wrote in his letter to the Romans: "For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that we shall be revealed" (Romans 8:18) .

We must take our focus from the difficult situation we are living, suffering, and turn our attention to what awaits us. For it is the longest tunnel, know that he has a purpose. And the end result is directly related to their effort, their dependence on God, their trust in him. "Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of good courage, not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with you wherever you go "(Joshua 1:9).

One purpose of suffering is to print the character of God in us. God is not a masochist. He takes no pleasure in our pain or the tragedies that plague our lives. God allows us to pass through difficulties to fulfill in us His will. And remember that "all things work together for good to them that love God, to those who are called according to his purpose" (Romans 8:28)